You Are Enough

My beautiful baby girl took her first two steps this week. Two, tiny, tentative steps. My heart soared with pride! Then, it broke just a little too. Isn’t that one of the most astonishing, surprising things about parenthood? Who knew that your heart would break so often and so easily? Who knew what a vast range of emotions you would feel at any given moment?

My sweet A took two little baby steps. Two tiny steps away from me and into this big ‘ole world. Just the thought of it cracked my heart wide open. My A – she is a darling baby. Happy and sweet and so easy to love. I want to wrap her up and keep her safe and secure in my arms. I want to pack her away in a big ‘ole happy bubble with N, where they’ll both be safe, where nothing can hurt them. Huh. It reminds me of  “Finding Nemo”, when Marlin says, “I promised I’d never let anything happen to him.” And, Dory responds brilliantly, saying, “Hmmm. That’s a funny thing to promise. You can’t never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him. Not much fun for little Harpo.” And, so, I’ll hold my breath and pray A LOT as she takes more and more steps on her own and out into her very own adventure …. And, I’ll be here. Holding her father’s hand and waiting and watching. I’ll be here. For her. For N. If they stumble, fall, feel lost, or want to hide away, I’ll be here. To tell them that they are enough. To tell them not to apologize for who they are. Be YOU, dear babies! You are aways enough to me!

 

One day, when the light falls and the darkness sets in,

You may wonder if you are enough.

You are.

You are always enough.

 

When kids are mean and the world seems hard,

You may wonder if you are enough.

You are.

You are always enough.

 

When you doubt yourself, when you doubt your truth,

You may wonder if you are enough.

You are.

You are always enough.

 

When a boy breaks your heart,

You may wonder why you weren’t enough for him to love.

You were. You are.

You are always enough.

 

When you feel lonely and don’t quite fit in,

You may wonder if you are enough.

You are.

You are always enough.

 

When things just aren’t quite right,

When you don’t feel pretty enough or tall enough or smart enough,

Even when you feel let down by life,

Remember that you are enough.

 

You are loved. You are adored.

I whisper it into the wind,

So that one day it may find you,

My love will always find you.

 

The beauty inside you,

Radiates from you,

You are SO much.

You are always, always enough.

 

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Morning Glory

I’m not a morning person. I never have been. Yet, somehow, mornings have managed to creep their way into my heart. Without noticing that it was happening, morning snuck up on me and became my favorite part of the day. So unexpected, yet so refreshing….

Most mornings, A wakes first and R slips out of bed to go to her. He lets me sleep a little longer. He enjoys the first sweet coos and smiles of the morning with his itty-bitty one. She turns on the charm for him and they share some precious time together before he has to head off to work.

N wakes next and quietly sneaks in our room. He slips into bed next to me and wraps himself around me. He’s all sleepy sounds and smells and cowlicks in the morning. He’s full of ‘just-awake’ sweetness and he curls into me. We snuggle-buggle (our favorite word for cuddling) like that for a few minutes under the covers, until he’s more awake and starts whispering excitedly … then come the giggles and tickles.

After A’s bottle is gone, she and R make their way back up us, bringing our Harper (our golden girl) with them. She’ll bounce up with kisses and licks and good-morning wiggles. We share a few happy, family moments all in bed together before our day really starts. It’s untouched, unspoiled. The whole day is still in front of us and no matter what yesterday was like or what happened during the night, THIS day is still new. Fresh with possibility and hope. Before there are any meltdowns or time-outs or battles over food. Before I get tired or impatient. Before I lose my temper or feel like I’m failing miserably at this whole momma gig. Before N cries about something. Before A cries about something. Before the messes and spills happen. Before any wine is poured just to survive the ‘witching hour’ that we call dinner-time. Before evening comes, when we will all be tired, ready to wipe the slate clean again, ready to rest and renew. Before all of THAT, there is THIS … this beautiful morning.

This precious morning routine that we’ve established won’t last. Change is certain, especially with little ones. R and A won’t always greet the early morning together. N won’t always crawl into bed to snuggle with his momma. The mornings may slip away from me once again, no longer being my favorite. But, not today. Today is not that day. Today, I embrace the happiness that’s in my heart and push away the fear that tries to creep in. Today, I savor the peace that morning brings to our home and lives. God has given us a gift. A beautiful new morning. Take it. Savor it. Cherish it.

Happy morning, friends. Happy day!